County Clerk takes the Civil out of my Union

My civil union was not quite as civil as I had hoped. It turns out, nobody at the Lake County courthouse, here in Illinois, had any clue about how to advise me of my right to spousal name change. In fact, I was flat out wrongly advised, repeatedly, and told that I have to file for a legal, adult change of name. It costs $250 to file, not to mention any attorney fees. It takes weeks to months to complete because it requires me to change the name on my birth certificate. I don't have that kind of time or patience. No other married partner in IL has to file a legal name change. It's not equality if you have to pay for it. And so, I began my quest for the truth. It didn't take long to discover the website for LAMBDA legal, and follow the link to their Civil Union informational page. According to their page, all I have to do is go to the local DMV, take my civil union certificate and pay $5 for a name change. Then, I go to Social Security and the passport agency and basically do the same. It's so simple! I called the DMV to be sure it is true and a nice lady confirmed that it is. I'd like to say that everything at the courthouse was just a misunderstanding and that I believe the officials, in the Lake County Clerk's office, are well meaning. However, the call I made this afternoon to their office leads me to think otherwise. The woman who answered the phone was rude and misinformed and trying to misinform me, once again, unapologetically.

I had called to find out why it's taking so long to receive my certificate and she said, after keeping me on hold for quite a while, that these things take time. I asked if she was aware of the mix up last week regarding civil union partners and spousal name change. She immediately responded by telling me it has to be done in the courts. I told her that's not true. She insisted that it was true and specifically stated that it was because civil unions do not entitle partners to all the same rights as married couples. I must admit that it felt good to inform her that I absolutely do have every single right that any other married spouse in Illinois has, and that she can call the DMV and ask Tania herself. That seemed to silence her, momentarily, and then she said, "I'll share this information with everybody in the office. The governor's office sent us nothing about this.".

Wouldn't it be better if the Lake County Clerk's office actually took the time to review the laws they are sworn, under oath, to uphold and apply equally? Would it be too much to ask for someone to admit that they don't know the answer, rather than send me on a wild goose chase, based on their own personal assumption that I am not equal under the law?

I thought I'd get a different answer from the woman who sat at at the civil union information desk. We gave her our $10 and asked about how I can change my name. She became almost hostile, in defense of her obvious ignorance. I wasn't trying to sound accusatory, I simply wanted the correct info. She informed me that she is not a lawyer, civil unions are not marriages and that she doesn't give information, she just accepts payments. That's when I pointed to the arrow, pointing at her, that said INFO. I told her that I didn't see why I'd need an attorney, when no other married couple brings one to their courthouse wedding. I said, consider me pro se. Here's a print out of the law, here's how it's interpreted by the IL Bar association website, as printed yesterday. Either you know or you don't. If you don't, then, I'll take whatever steps are necessary to inform you, when I find out.

What keeps repeating in my head is the notion, by any of these people, that I am not a spouse and that I'm not subject to the same legal rights and responsibilities. I believe that my situation will be a recurring one if County Clerks across the state are not bothering to inform themselves of the law and the common processes that marriage and civil unions share. I believe that if the county clerk had put as much energy and manpower into learning the law they oversee, as they did into vehemently disagreeing with me, in front of everyone there that day, this might not happen to another couple, on their special day.